Monday, September 15, 2008

It'd Been Over a Month . . .

. . . since my Chevy Hydra (1 of 3, ever) had taken ill. I narrowed it down to the fuel pump, and the battery I killed in making this fuel pump determination.

Chicago is a terrible city to own a vehicle in. No matter where you are, parking will always be a bitch. Parking signs are never in agreement with one another. You'll lose an average of one side-mirror per year. And you typically have less than 24-hours notice of street cleaning. (If your car is stationed on a designated street during cleaning, you can be ticketed, towed, or both.) In fact, the only thing worse than having a car, is having to rely on public transportation. Spend 45-minutes waiting for a bus while the wind coming off the lake hits you, and you'll deal with all the previous and more.

Last month, my car was stationed at the mark indicated. For reference, I live in the giant 'E'.

My immobile automobile was less than a block away from my apartment. In Chicago, that's better than any opiate. Then the street cleaning signs went up. So I was forced to put the Hydra in neutral and shove onwards.

This wasn't too bad, Just up the street and to the left. There was no traffic, and parking was ample. It was merely an inconvenience.

Unfortunately, street cleaning there was slated three days later. I had to move the car again.

I'd originally planned to go further, crossing Broadway onto a calm residential side street. But there was a challenge: Broadway. No matter what city you live in, Broadway will always be bustling. After spending thirty minutes waiting for a break, I gave up and pushed the car into a metered spot during off-hours. A good Samaritan took mercy and helped me during this haul.

The meters went into effect at 7:00 AM, I got to my car at 5:30 AM with no idea what I was going to do.

Since it was so early, everyone was home. The spots on Magnolia were all taken. I had to keep on going.

Pushing a car nearly half a mile wasn't difficult. PARALLEL PARKING A CAR IN NEUTRAL IS THE HARDEST FUCKING THING YOU CAN EVER DO, EVER!!!

I was able to relax for a week until a neighborhood function closed off the street. The flyer secured to my wiper read, "Violaters Will Be Towed."

The difficulty comes in finding a spot you can wedge yourself into, and not be trapped later. As I shoved my car in the light rain, I couldn't help but think this would be much easier if I had friends. I should get to work on that.

In the meantime, I had to move the car once more.

Since then, I was able to find the time to work on the car. It goes, but not very well. It seems the Hydra's sole purpose is to avoid tickets by being moved from one block to the next.

This is what will be known as my Trail of Tears.


Oliver Babbles said...

reading this made my day much better.


Anonymous said...

Okay, I need to know about the Hydra. A google search for 'Chevy Hydra' brings up nothing. I know people don't usually make blog requests, but could you tell the story of the Hydra, maybe put up some pictures? 1 of 3 ever? I work with a bunch of car geeks.